Sugar Detox Day 47: Falling Off the Wagon

This post is long overdue.

But I haven't been able to type out the words.  So everyday when I knew I should be blogging/confessing, I found myself too busy to sit down.  The truth is, I was just embarrassed and ashamed about falling off of my sugar detox plan.  And boy did I fall down.  Hard.

After six weeks of near perfection on this sugar detox, I got to the point last week, in Week 6, when I could start adding back some sugars.  Just to see how my body would react.  Just to see what would make my sugar cravings spike again so I would know to avoid those foods.  Well, just the opposite happened.

I guess it started with busyness.  Therefore, I didn't have time to go to the store or plan out meals.  I was living on whatever we had in the house or, in a pinch, grabbing something at a restaurant or drive through.  The kids and I grabbed fast food last week twice, which is not like us.  At Jack 'n the Box I had a Chicken Fajita Pita and a Diet Coke, so really with the bread on the pita and the fake sugars in the diet soda, I was cheating twice.  The Diet Coke tasted awful by the way, and I haven't had a soda since.  After the pita, I grabbed a couple of the kids' fries, and I realized that I had officially consumed a super lame fast food meal.  My stomach hurt after, but my cravings for salt and carbs was going through the roof!

I think another reason I fell off the plan was that I exercised last week, a lot.  I exercised five days last week.  Twice I just ran on the elliptical machine, and three times I did a cross-training style workout.  One of those cross-training workouts was with Autumn and it was awesome.  Now you may be asking, what does working out for five days have to do with sabotaging your sugar detox?  And believe me, I've spent some time analyzing it too.  But here's the truth, I love exercising.  And I really like working out with weights.  Going for a walk is nice, but it doesn't feel like I've done enough to change my body.  Walking is boring too, unless it's somewhere super beautiful or busy, with lots to look at.  Anyway, exercising for the five days last week made me so hungry.  After a workout, I would come in and drink some cold water, but would search around for a snack.  And a cheese stick or a piece of jerky just didn't satisfy.  I wanted a piece of fruit, or bread, or a protein shake, something more filling.  And so I did.  That extra little mini-meal really added up.

Then at night after a workout, I would be ravenous.  Once the kids had gone to bed, I found myself back in my old evening hang-out spot: the snack cupboard.  We have a snack cabinet AND a snack drawer.  The cabinet holds the popcorn, peanut butter, cookies, Wheat Thins, Cheese-Its, pretzels, etc.  The snack drawer holds the granola bars, fruit snacks, and any actual candy the kids have gotten from birthday parties.  And the thing is, I'd been able to totally avoid the snack corner since detoxing!  It was really tough to break the habit to migrate there during the evening hours, especially during the first two weeks, but I totally broke the habit.  At night, I've been making hot tea, or just drinking some cold water, and that's it!  But the exercise, which obviously burned more calories, made me crave more calories and I easily fell back into my old bad habits.  Now this is not to say that I HAD to make unhealthy choices in snacks at night.  I could just as easily munched on bell peppers and hummus instead of caramel popcorn, but I made that bad choice last week.

Finally, chips. Yep, chips.  I went up to San Diego this last weekend, and we were invited to lunch with my parents at their condo.  My mom asked me to pick up some chips to go with the deli tray she had ordered.  Ok.  Now during the first six weeks of the detox, I would be very wise about this type of request.  I would buy a bag of chips in a flavor that I detest.  Therefore, when I went to lunch, I wouldn't be tempted by the nasty chips.  But this time, since I was allowed to eat some sugars and carbs, I decided on two of my favorite flavors: Sour Cream Wavy Lays and Honey BBQ Wavy Lays.  They are soooooo good.  My kryptonite, really.  Here's how it went.  I ate a delicious lunch of shaved turkey, roast beef, and fresh cheese slices with slices of tomato and red onion with a squirt of mustard.  Totally acceptable and sugar free.  Then I decided to have a couple chips, I mean, a couple should be fine, right?!  Wrong.

This is literally what happened.  While standing beside the chips bags, hand in the bag of Sour Cream Wavy Lays, and crunching away, my mom actually said, "April,  what's wrong?  Is everything ok?"  Apparently, it's a big red flag for mothers when their supposedly sugar detoxing daughter is eating a bag of chips like it's the last meal on earth.  By the way, I love my mom for saying that.  Because there was something wrong.  I knew at that point that I had majorly messed up all week long in little ways, that had led to this big problem, and now I was punishing myself with eating.  My attitude was, "I've already totally messed  this up, so why not just ruin the whole day?  At least I can enjoy these chips."

That was the very first time in my life when I saw so incredibly clearly the correlation between my emotional state and food.  Never before had I seen myself as having an emotional relationship with food.  I had convinced myself that I ate sweet food or salty food because it tasted good, period.  But no, that whole philosophy was shattered as I realized I was super down emotionally, and that's why I reached for chips.  I felt so disappointed that all week had been an exercise in cheating.  The carbs and sugars made me feel bad, bloated, and uncomfortable.  And I hated that feeling.  That feeling of being out of control, and allowing a very average flavor of salty chips to completely derail me from my goal.

I wish I could say I had a moment of clarity right there with my mom and I threw the bag of chips away and never took a second look.  But I didn't.  We took the remaining chips home, and I munched on the way home.  And when we finally arrived home from San Diego, I actually had to ask my husband to throw them away for me.  Ridiculous!  And weak!  I know.  But it doesn't matter, because it worked.  Something about those chips made me a little crazy.

Bottom line, I know from this last week's experiment in attempting to slowly add in sugars that first, I am not ready to add in sugars.  Second, I am just as addicted to salty, crunchy things as sugars, and they are a trigger for other bad eating choices.  Third, fast food is almost always a bad choice.  In a pinch, order something bun less, or a salad without dressing.  But here's a better idea…don't be in a pinch!  Pack snacks and lunch!  The fact the we get hungry around the same times everyday shouldn't be a huge surprise to us, that's how we were designed!

Here comes what I didn't want to share last week when I was supposed to blog my weigh-in numbers.  I gained 2.0 pounds last week, bringing my total weight loss down from 11.4 to 9.4 pounds.  When I stepped on the scale, I was so angry and disappointed in myself.  But here's the cool thing.  I quickly got over it.  I stepped off the scale and asked God to help me.  Something I hadn't done the last week when I was going crazy, at all.  And He did.  As He always does.  He calmed my spirit, took away my guilt.  He loved me.  Pure and simple.  And I started fresh the very next day.

Today I am wrapping up Week 7 of the detox.  I feel fantastic, and am completely back on track.  The important idea I've learned from my failures the week before is how quickly I can rebound with God's loving help.  No task is too small for Him, no cry for help too frivolous.  His love is so deep and wide and awesome.  This coming Sunday marks the beginning of Week 8, my final week on this journey!  I'm so excited!  Here's a beautiful inspiring verse that I plan on memorizing this week, to hold in my arsenal against bad food choices.  Especially chips.

 “Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20).

Sugar Detox Day 40: A Weigh-In, My New Favorite Treat, and a Trip to Starbucks.

Well, well, well…hello there!  It's been a while, and I've missed you!  I've been rolling along with life, wrapping up summer activities, and gearing up for another year of homeschool, and I haven't taken the time to sit down and update my detox progress.  So….it's time!

Last Sunday I wrapped up Week 5 of the 8 week detox and lost another 1.6 pounds, bringing my total weight loss up to 11.4 pounds.  So thrilling!  Before I started this detox, I set little weight loss goals for myself along the way to motivate me.  For the first 10 pounds lost, I awarded myself a little shopping spree at one of my new favorite stores!  That reward is a lot more fun than an ice cream binge, I can tell you that much!

Last Monday started Week 6 of the detox, and Sarah Wilson's plan advises "Adding Some Sweetness Back In."  That's the actual title of the Week 6 chapter!

So what sugars can I add back in this week?

• Low-fructose fruit like blueberries and raspberries, plums, strawberries and oranges.  No tropical fruits that are full of sugar are allowed just yet, so nope, not yet, bananas and pineapples!  
• Stevia, the all natural sweetener, has no fructose, and is an acceptable sweetener.  In fact, Stevia is Wilson's favorite overall sweetener, over honey and agave syrup.
• Coconut water, oil, flakes, cream, milk.  Wilson devotes a full 3 pages in her book to the coconut.  Her section is titled "9 Moments in Coconut Love."  From coconut granola, made with coconut oil, flakes, almonds, and Stevia, to just drinking coconut water (free of added sugars of course), Wilson basically describes her love affair with the coconut.  
• 85% Cocoa Chocolate.  Sure, it may have tasted like baking chocolate before the detox, but Wilson swears it tastes pretty delicious after a couple months off of the sweet stuff.  

I decided to add in fruit this week.  On Tuesday, instead of a spoonful of almond butter for my 3:00 PM snack, I munched on an apple.  I hadn't had fruit in 2 weeks!  That first bite of apple tasted so sweet, so juicy, so perfect.  Apples have now become my new favorite treat.  Last spring, as one of their homeschool projects, the kids had to gather 2-3 apples of every variety at the store, then bring them home for a taste test, and come up with a chart, showing our family favorites by person.  So let's just say I only buy Jazz and Cripps Pink apples.  

Everyday this week, I've had a little something sweet just to see how I would react.  My plan was that if I ate something sweet, and then experienced major cravings, I would know that I wasn't ready for that just yet.  So one morning I made a strawberry, blueberry, greek yogurt, protein powder and spinach smoothie.  No problems with that, I was back to sugar-free the rest of the day.  Another morning, I added blueberries to my oatmeal, and even a dash of milk.  Again, no problem.  

Here's what didn't work:  a Starbucks iced latte with skim milk and two pumps of sugar-free vanilla syrup.  I was in El Centro, running around with the kids in the hot afternoon.  And I needed a pick-me-up, and I'd forgotten to pack one of my handy-dandy snacks.  So there was a Starbucks.  And isn't there always a Starbucks?  Everywhere you look almost?  Anyway, I remembered, "hey, I can have sugar now, in fact, I can have fake sugar!  Sarah Wilson said so!"  So I ordered myself the grande latte described above.  And it was glorious.  So glorious that I wanted another one.  Right away.  Right then.  I actually told myself, "it's ok, calm down, you can have another one tomorrow."  And that's when it hit me.  I can't order those anymore.  At least, not for a while.  That sugar-free latte triggered my cravings like nothing has in the last 6 weeks.  So, sorry Starbucks.  If you see me in your drive-through, it will be to order a bottle of water.  And that's ok.  The sugar addict in me actually recognizes that it is very unhealthy for me to again be planning out and scheming when I can next buy a sweet drink.  So no thank you.  

Also, just as added proof that the latte wasn't in my best interest, immediately after drinking it, I felt my stomach start to cramp.  It hurt bad.  My body didn't want that fake sugar in it.  It was mad at me for reintroducing the fake sugars into my now fully cleansed, clean eating body.  The natural sugars, the fruits I've added, haven't bothered me at all.  I attribute it to the fact that God made our bodies to consume the things that He gave us to eat. Fruits, vegetables, meats, dairy, etc.  And I know that God gave us honey and agave, and other natural sugars too, but the fake sugars, like sugar-free syrups, are not the best for me personally.  

Another weigh-in is just around the corner.  And then on to Week 7!  The detox is over in just 2 weeks.  Hard to believe that I am so close.  That first tough week feels like decades ago, it's only forward motion from here on out!  

Sugar Detox Day 32: How to Be Sugar-Free (and happy) at Restaurants

Going sugar and simple carbohydrate free is a tough choice.  It takes a lot of commitment, especially when eating at restaurants.  I mean, think about it.  Carbohydrate free equals no bread before dinner, no crackers with soup, no croutons on the salad, no tortilla around your burrito, and no bun for that burger.  The first week was a challenge.  I basically stayed away from restaurants.  Not knowing what to order, or what was acceptable was too much for my headachy first week detoxing brain to compute.  And it's super easy to stay on track at home, where I can shop for and prepare my own foods.  And I am in control!! Woohhoooohoohaahahaaa!!  (That was supposed to be a diabolical laugh...but…sorry.)

Anyway,  I just wanted to review some of the restaurants I've frequented lately, and their sugar-free ease of ordering:

1. Chili's - Chicken, Shrimp, or Beef Fajitas.  These are so incredibly delicious!! They come out on a sizzling platter with sautéed onions and green bell peppers underneath the perfectly seasoned meat.  The fajitas also come with a cool little condiment tray.  With three different salsas, sour cream, and guacamole, it's a truly fabulous meal.  I just decline the tortillas, and I'm good to go!
2. Grasso's (Italian Restaurant, a local favorite) - Grilled salmon with Vegetables.  This made me pretty nervous.  I mean, Grasso's is all about the cheesy, delicious pizza, the mouth-watering salad and garlic bread….Yum.  But I decided on the most healthy option, and Autumn's suggestion.  Ok, I'm not going to lie to you.  The salmon just can't compete with the pizza or chicken piccata.  But what can, really?  They served the salmon with sautéed onions and mushrooms.  I actually decided after that meal sautéed mushrooms and onions added to any meat is my perfect meal.  Sooooo good.  The vegetables were pretty bad, super bland.  I hate to admit that, but it's true.  I salted them up, and enjoyed a pre-dinner Grasso's salad, and I didn't feel one bit deprived.
3. Casa De Pico (our favorite Mexican food stop on our way out of San Diego) - Mexican Stir-Fry or Albondigas.  This is a sugar-free, carb-free person's paradise!  Multiple items are acceptable.  And everything looks enticing.  The Mexican Stir Fry has become my favorite item because it is full of vegetables, delicious chicken and sits on a bed of rice.  I probably eat a quarter of the rice on the plate, just because the less carbs the better!  
4. Nana Dora's (another local favorite Mexican food spot) - Carne Asada Burrito.  I'm learning to avoid tortillas.  At Dora's, I just order a carne asada burrito with guacamole.  And I eat the inside only.  Dora's has the best salsa on the planet, so I just douse it in a bunch of salsa, and munch on some baby carrots on the side.  
5. In-N-Out Burger - Protein Style Burger with Grilled Onions - This is a burger that when I eat it, I truly don't miss the bun.  Crazy, right?  The burger shows up wrapped in a giant leaf of iceberg lettuce, but it still has all the goodies on the inside.  Sooooo good.  Don't forget the grilled onions; they are essential!  
6. The Prado (in Balboa Park) - Calamari and Halibut.  What a fantastic restaurant!  My mom, sister and I went to the Prado before going to the Old Globe Theater to see Othello last week.  I ordered the calamari as an appetizer instead of bread or an after dinner dessert because this was one of Sarah Wilson's tips.  She says she orders calamari for dessert since it tastes decadent and fancy and therefore, she doesn't feel left out when her friends all order desserts.  The seared halibut and veggies was melt in your mouth savory, and I left full, satisfied, and ready to watch some Shakespearean tragedy!   

Check out my super-duper sugar/carb free ordering tips:

• Ask for the bread on the table to be taken away, pronto!  That is, if your fellow diners don't care.
• Enjoy an appetizer.  Tons of restaurants now offer stuffed mushrooms, calamari, crudités, crab cakes, or other such decadents to start or end your meal.  
• Ask for extra vegetables on the side of your main dish instead of potatoes, rice, or other carbohydrate.
• Consider ordering a savory appetizer for dessert. 
• Eat a little something before the meal, like in the car on the way over.  Oftentimes, I will munch on some Babybel light cheese, just to take the edge off, so I don't give in to the temptation to eat the chips or bread on the table.  

Just three and a half more weeks to go, and I'm feeling great!  

Sugar Detox Day 29: Week 4 Weigh-In

Yesterday was weigh-in day for Week 4 of my sugar detox.  I lost 1.2 pounds last week, bringing my total weight loss for four weeks to 9.8 pounds.  Yeeeeee!!!

The weight loss is really slowing down, and I'm actually not too disturbed about that.  The number one goal of this little experiment was to conquer my bondage to sugar.  So if I lose some weight in the process, great!  But if I hadn't lost one pound, I would still be happy if my body was shifting from craving sugar all the time to craving real food without sweetness.

I've started exercising again, but very slowly.  One of the problems with being a sugar addict is that I am hypoglycemic.  I have low blood sugar, and so I need a constant flow of food energy to keep myself from getting sick.  When I was a child, my family called it "hot tummy."  We'd be on the way to church and I would develop "hot tummy" and we'd have to pull over for a donut on the way.  Hot tummy is simply hypoglycemia screaming out for calories.  I start to feel lightheaded, and then nauseous, and if unfed, I usually throw up.

When I first start an exercise program again, I always get hot tummy the first few weeks.  And I know I can't totally blame it on hypoglycemia.  It probably has to do with me being incredibly out of shape and asking my body to push itself to a place it hasn't been in a long time.  I've been working out for 20 minutes on my elliptical machine three times per week or so.  I don't push it too hard, so I haven't gotten sick at all.

Well, last week when Health Coach Autumn came over, I warned her of my issue, and luckily, Autumn has seen it all before.  So after 10 minutes of air squats, push ups (girlie ones), and squat presses, I felt myself overheating and getting dizzy.  And that was it.  It was pretty embarrassing, because actually, I thought I was more in shape than that!  A couple of years ago when I'd hired a personal trainer, I was able to complete an hour long cross fit style workout.  And now I can barely huff and puff it through 10 minutes!  I felt so disappointed.  So needless to say, the 1.2 pound weight loss this week doesn't surprise me.  I hardly exercised!

Since Week 4 of the detox closed yesterday, I'm starting Week 5 today!  Sarah Wilson's Week 5 chapter is called, "Get creative, experiment…and detox."  Apparently this is the stage when cravings become almost unbearable.  So Sarah lists a bunch of ways to avoid giving in to the sugar temptation.
So when craving sugar:

1. Wait 20 minutes.  Then after the 20 minutes, reevaluate if you need the sugar.  Make a cup of tea while you wait. 
2. Infuse your life with other sweet rewards, not sugar.
1. Burn incense.
2. Call someone sweet.
3. Drink tea.
4. Meditate.
3. Try herbal supplements
1. Chromium - regulates insulin, can lower insulin resistance.
2. Calcium & Magnesium - help combat adrenal stress and help curb sugar desire.  
3. Gymema - an Indian herb  that powerfully curbs sugar cravings.
4. Green Tea - reduces the GI of food intake.
5. Cinnamon - stops sugar cravings.
6. Licorice root tea - tastes sweet without containing sugar; feeds and nourishes adrenal glands. 

Again, the above are from Sarah Wilson's, "I Quit Sugar" e-book.  Personally, I love drinking tea, so that suggestion is already part of my sugar fighting arsenal!  And meditation through my prayers to Jesus are essential.  As far as the herbal supplements go, I have tried chromium and a calcium/magnesium combo, and  they do help!  I like to take them at lunch time, so that when my 3:00 PM crazy-sugar-craving-time rolls around, I have a little help from my vitamins that are just then kicking in!  

On to Week 5 of the detox!  I am at the half-way point, and am so happy that I've made it this far!  Wish me luck for another week on the journey to good health!  

Sugar Detox Day 25: Sugar-Free at Camp

I felt a huge amount of trepidation driving up to camp with regards to my sugar detox.  I mean, it's camp.  And camp usually serves camp food.  Like mountains of macaroni and cheese, cereals that flood out of plastic dispensers, and spaghetti night after night.  When the first day of camp rolled around, I had been avoiding all simple carbohydrates and sugars for two solid weeks.  What was I to do with meal after meal of carbs, carbs, carbs??

So I had a plan.  I packed a cool chest full of portable veggie packs, the ones with a small ranch dressing container in the center.  I added Babybel cheese, almond butter, and plenty of turkey jerky and my new favorite Bacon Jerky.  I was set.  Camp was not going to destroy my focus or hinder my goals…so there!

Needless to say, I had no reason to worry.  The food was amazing.  Each morning they served scrambled eggs (real eggs, not powdered),  and another breakfast protein.  Plus, they always set out a hot oatmeal bar.  Complete with brown sugar, and dried fruits.  I avoided these of course.  My typical breakfast included a scoop of eggs, a few pieces of sausage or bacon, and a small bowl of oatmeal with whole milk poured over it.  And it was perfect.

But I felt nervous again at lunchtime.  Camp lunches usually meant sandwiches.  Sometimes even just peanut butter and jelly!  Then what?  But let's just say peanut butter and jelly is never on the menu at this camp.  They served build your own sandwiches ones day, but I just avoided the bread.  The next day they served chicken legs and the next meatballs.  Sure, they always included some delicious looking carbohydrate option that was super hard to pass up, but I did it.  Each and every time, I stuck to my guns and avoided the carbs.  At lunch, a huge salad bar, surrounded by delicious toppings greeted us.  I indulged in ranch dressing every time.  I was pleasantly surprised that I hadn't had to crack open my cool chest yet.

The dinners were simply delicious.  Some appeared basic, like meatloaf.  But the meatloaf tasted really good!! Ok, it wasn't Pioneer Woman delicious, but still, super tasty!  I avoided the ketchup and it tasted great.  One night we had fajitas, and the meat and sautéed veggies were amazing.  Another night we had a greek style meal, with chicken breasts wrapped in prosciutto and smothered in pesto sauce.  The meats were always amazing, but the vegetable choices were even better.  This is what floored me!  What camp serves delicious vegetables?  I mean, it's kind of easy to throw out a salad bar that's half-way decent, but truly tasty fresh vegetables?  No way, right?!  Wrong!   Almost every night, we had beautiful combinations of squash, broccoli, carrots, onions, and cauliflower.  My kids, especially James the veggie lover, would ask for more veggies!!

Two nights out of the week, Forest Home had organized special adult-only dinners.  All the adults semi-dress up, think casual cotton dresses, and the guys maybe have on an ironed shirt and shorts. The younger kids happily join up with their CCA's while the older kids attend their evening sessions.  And the adults are served a gorgeous gourmet meal.  Now I have to admit that when I read this on the information guide at home, I had a terrible attitude about it.  I mean, what are they going to do? It's  still camp.  Are they just going to have us tuck cloth napkins into our necks while we gnaw on ribs? I mean, come on.  Boy was I wrong….again!  Once a year, on our anniversary, Danny and I go out to a fancy restaurant and have an amazing dinner. You know, one of those dinners where the food comes out looking more like art?  One where the meat is perfectly cooked and lays on a pile of beautiful vegetables, and the sauce swirls in a gorgeous design around the edge of the plate?  Yeah, that's what we had at camp.  And it was fantastic.

So, no.  I never opened my cool chest.  Not once.  The cool chest sat, and was eventually used as a "chair" for the dirty clothes bag.

Camp was a complete success, spiritually and diet-wise.

But I have a few confessions to make.

On Wednesday, Danny had to come home to the Valley for work.  I felt so sad when he left, so disappointed.  As the kids munched on their 3:00 ice creams, I yearned for a bite.  Just one bite.  But I stayed strong.  Well, let's just say I didn't carry that resolve with me to the campfire later that night when everyone made s'mores.  Yep. I had a s'more.  That was my first cheat in 2 1/2 weeks. And you know what's crazy?  I'm ok with it.  I ate one single s'more.  Not five.  Not even two.  I gave myself permission to enjoy that sweet moment with my little family.  And I allowed myself to feel a little sad about Danny not being with us.  Because I was disappointed and missing him in that moment.  I don't like the fact that the cheat was based on an emotion, but I'm not perfect, and I accepted it.  Right there, in that moment, I accepted my weakness, and went on.

The next day, after an amazing mexican dinner, they served warm churros, drizzled with caramel sauce.  I didn't say no.  And it tasted like warm crispy caramel heaven.  And the day after that, I drank an entire Chai blended drink.  Because, yep, camp has an amazing little coffee house on site.  And that was it for my cheats.  I felt no guilt, and I still don't.  Do you know what a huge breakthrough that is for me?  That I could knowingly "cheat" on my detox and not feel guilt?  Normally the guilt would turn into a crazy feeling of oh-well-I-already-messed-up-I-guess-the-day-is-ruined-so-I'll-have-ice-cream.  But it didn't.  At the next meal, I was equally aware of eating meats, veggies and salad, and was able to avoid carbohydrates and sugar.

When I told my health coach yesterday that I indulged a little but felt fine about it, I was beaming from ear to ear, and so was she!  She said I had reached a mini-milestone!  Knowing how hard it has been for me to get to this point, she urged me onward to enjoy life (including a s'more once in a while), but to stay true to my goals.

Before I reveal my weight loss (or gain) while at camp, one other small note.  Forest Home camp is exremely hilly.  Meaning everywhere I walked, I was climbing or descending a hill.  And we walked everywhere.  To the dining hall multiple times a day,  I had to hike up a steep hill, steeper than Cattle Call hill!  My legs burned all the way up.  And boy did that start to feel good.  To the pool, walk up a hill.  To the craft cabin, go up that hill.  To the main session, hike up that hill!  So I burned a lot of calories all week long, just getting where I needed to go!

Soooo…. drumroll please….In a week at camp, never feeling deprived, enjoying delicious meals and 3 cheats, I lost 1.6 pounds!!  Yeeeee!!  Making my total weight loss to date: 8.6 pounds total!  My original goal was to lose 30 pounds, so I have 21.4 to go.  This seems doable now.  Thirty is a big number.  But 21 pounds?  That's achievable.  I know that.

My next weigh-in is in just three more days.  I haven't cheated this week even once!  I guess a s'more in the 110 degree desert just doesn't sound as delightful as the one baked to perfection over the campfire at camp.  Until next year, then!

Sugar Detox Day 24: High on Life

Have you ever experienced a definite, noticeable, game-changing, highpoint in your life?   And it changed your thought process?  Your mind seemed to shift?  And most importantly, you realized it either in that exact moment or right after, that, "Wow, my life will never be the same"?  This highpoint moment redefined something about yourself or who you are.   And the moment brought clarity to previously darkened or blurry spots in your consciousness.   That happens to people when their first (second, or third, or fourth) baby is born, or when they receive news that they've been accepted into the college of their dreams, or a close family member dies, or when they come to know the Lord Jesus, or when they've been hired or fired from a job, or when they stand in a beautiful setting, like atop a mountain's peak, and they sense the closeness, the infinite magnitude of our Creator.

I experienced a mind shift as described above this weekend.

Our family spent last week at Forest Home Family Camp, which sits just 15 minutes up in the mountains from Yucaipa.  Now I've attended Christian camps before, as a kid and teenager, and I would always leave those camps with a deep sense of purpose, and a renewed commitment to the Lord.  But, as often happens after church camp, I would arrive back home and after only a week or so, I'd fall back into my old ways, not allowing the clarity of the week's experiences to saturate my real life.

This week was truly an immeasurable gift from God.  We were surrounded by God's beautiful, forested creation.  Waking to the sun slanting through the pine trees; our little cabin felt nestled among the rocks, shrubs, and giant trees.  Strolling next to a burbling creek, where huge rocks had been etched with scripture:

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, 

“plans to prosper you and not to harm you, 

plans to give you hope and a future. 

Jeremiah 29:11

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, 

but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, 

I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

Galations 2:20

we read, saw, and felt God's presence.  We hiked along winding trails edged with wild blackberry bushes.  We swam in the pool which held views of the surrounding steep mountains.  It was a revelation to me just to be in the midst of God's beauty.

We were also blessed to hear incredible speakers.  Alistair Begg, national Bible scholar and preacher, spoke to us on the Book of Ruth.

I will never think of Ruth the same again.  In a time of great political turmoil and chaos, God fixed His gaze on a lonely and bitter widow, Naomi.  And He showed His great love and commitment to her through blessing her with a loyal daughter-in-law, and eventually a son, who would be in the line of King David, and years later, the Lord Jesus Himself.  I have never scribbled notes so quickly!   If interested in Alistair Begg, his Truth For Life website is a wonderful resource, and I've started reading his morning devotional and listening to his brief sermons.

Although I loved hearing Alistair Begg in person, I must admit that I have a special place in my heart for our morning speaker, Chris Simning.

If you ever have a chance in your life to hear one speaker who will change your life, I pray you will hear the story of Chris Simning.  His story had grown men, those who are not prone to crying, in pieces.  His solid dedication to Christ and story of redemption is something I will never forget.  He has some speaking videos on You Tube.  Here's one if interersted: Beauty from Brokenness by Chris Simning 

My sugar detox update will have to be tomorrow.  I was just brimming with excitement to share about my incredible trip, and ran out of time. But I had time to upload some fun family pics from the trip.  Take a look!  And consider taking your family to Forest Home Family Camp next summer, you will have the time of your life!  

The camp produced an incredible video of our week at camp.  If you need any further motivation, please watch, and cry (as I do every time I watch it).  Keep your eyes open for any and all Walkers in the Forest Home Family Camp 2014 Video

On our first official morning at camp, we took a walk down to the creek.  This is where they have scripture rocks along the way. 

James really was happy!  I promise! 

The kids are painting projects at the Craft Cabin.  What a wonderful concept!  The kids went in and browsed all kinds of different craft projects: wood projects, ceramics, mosaics, paper crafts like card making, leather-working, etc.  They pick out their project, add accessories, mom buys the project, then we go the craft desk and get all materials we need to complete it.  

We have an official rule in our family.  While on vacation, we have a sweet, and usually creamy snack mid afternoon.  Think ice cream.  Or in  this case, root beer floats.  Mom had a piece of bacon jerky.  

James had a fabulous time. 

Sunning on the lounge chair when the pool water was too cold.

Swinging on the rope swing like a boss!  

And playing mini-golf every chance he got!   Look out Uncle Chris! 

In our little corner of the campground, we quickly became known as the "musical family." Many mornings and lazy afternoons were filled with the sounds of Grace sawing away on her violin, or Clara plucking the tune of "500 Miles" on her mandolin, or James banging on his drum pad to the rhythm while Emma and Danny harmonized with their beautiful voices.  

Mom watched, and took lots of pictures.  

Lake Day at Forest Home is a definite highlight. 

 Grace and Clara can be seen jumping on the floating trampoline.   

Beautiful Clara loved every bit of her time in the water!  Such a sweetie! 

Danny took off for the Valley for a few days of work right after Lake Day, 

so I grabbed a selfie with him before he left.  

It's 3:00 somewhere!  And at camp, that means it's time for shave ice.  

One of the best things about FH was the food!! More on that tomorrow! 

Cubs and mommy.  And just look at her long legs!  I've gotta grab lap time with my big girls anytime they want it! 

We finally learned the art of sleeping in while at camp.  My kids, who are normally fairly early risers, had to be roused by 8:00 every morning, just to make it to breakfast on time.  And did I mention how much we WOULD NOT WANT TO MISS BREAKFAST?  Yeah.  

Their faces indicate deep sadness, just in case you couldn't tell.  This is our last full day at FH, and we are all very unwilling to go home.  

The view from the pool.  

Such beauties, inside and out!   

The two girls on the left and right of the picture are our CCA's (Child Care Assistants) because, yep, FH thinks of everything. While the adults spent their evenings listening to Alistair Begg and twice having fancy adult dinners, the kids lived it up with two teenage gifts from God.  In fact, these two girls were such a blessing to our family at camp, that Grace cried when she left because she already missed her CCA's.  

Danny came back up to camp to help pack us up and take us home.  

I love this picture.  All three are smiling, kinda.  And it shows our favorite little cabin and number, so we will never forget it.  But it also shows Danny in the background, looking under the bed for forgotten blankies, solo socks, or Gracie's bunny, which always seems to find its way under the bed right when we have to leave anywhere.  Such a good dad!  

And such a great week!  We are already signed up to attend next year, and can't wait for another week of rest, relaxation and revival in God's presence.  Consider taking your family; it's a decision you won't regret.  

Sugar Detox Day 14: Week 2 Weigh in!

Today marks the end of my second week of the sugar detox.  Woo-hoo!!  I weighed in this morning and had lost another 1.8 pounds, bumping my total weight loss up to 7 pounds!!  And what's amazing is that I lost the 1.8 pounds last week and truly never felt hungry (Tillamook cheese every day will do that to you), and didn't exercise!  

Just to review, for week one, I quit the obvious sugar culprits: cake, cookies, candy, and simple carbs like bread, bagels, and croutons and I lost 5.4 pounds.  For week two, I added in tons of healthy fats, like full fat dairy, including CHEESE, avocado, coconut oil, and nuts. 

Again, today is the last day of Week 2, and tomorrow begins the dreaded Week 3.  If I could type "Week 3" in a scary, haunted house type font, I would. Because it scares me.  For Week 3, I have to cut it all.  All sugar.  

For Week 3 all of the following must go: 

• Fruit
• Fruit juice
• Dried fruit
• Tomato and BBQ sauces (they contain 50% sugar!)
• Any condiment containing sugar
• Balsamic vinegar (contains 15% sugar)
• Flavored yogurt
• Honey
• Agave 
• And obviously chocolate, soft drinks, artificial sweeteners, etc.

I've been eating a fair amount of fruit every day up to this point. Raspberries with my greek yogurt in the morning.  An apple and a slice of cheese for a mid-afternoon snack.  Raisins and dried apricots with my trail mix for a quick snack in the car.  And it all has to go.  The design of this sugar detox is so smart.  Two weeks ago, cutting all sugars, including the natural sugars found in fruit would have seemed an insurmountable task.  But today, after two weeks of learning how to eat clean with a diet of mainly meat, eggs, veggies, fruits and some dairy, cutting fruit just doesn't seem all that tough.  

But here's the kicker.  I'm leaving on vacation again today.  We are heading up to a Christian family camp in the mountains.  And this camp serves the food every day cafeteria style.  So in other words, whatever they serve is what we have to eat.  We don't have refrigerators in our cabins, so I can't take fresh food and stash it in there for healthy snacks.  It's a bit of a conundrum, really.  

Needless to say, I'm going to try my best, and there are a few things I can do to assist if I get in a jam up there and have only sugary or carb-filled options. First, I'm going to pack a small cool chest full of cheese, nuts, and sliced up veggies.  Second, I'm going to take along nuts so that when the cool chest is no longer cool, I'll have an acceptable sugar-free snack to munch on.  Finally, I am going to fully enjoy every moment of this camp.  If all they serve is food that is "unacceptable" on the diet, I'm going to have to eat it, but in moderation, and not complain about it.  In a way, it is what it is.  I'm going to enjoy this vacation!  

I won't be blogging all week, since leaving the computer at home is part of the deal when camping.  So I'll just leave you with a little humor!

Sugar Detox Day 13: My Sugar-Free Coastal Vacation

I've been on vacation for the last six days in sunny, beautiful San Diego.  My older two girls attended a Christian theater camp all week, while the twins and I hit up our favorite tourist destinations.  So while kicking up our heels at the beach, Balboa Park, the zoo, and spending lots of time in the swimming pool, yes, I was able to stay completely sugar-free and on plan.  Woo-hoo!!

I need to back-track just a little.  Last Sunday was my first weight-in, and boy was I nervous.  But after one week of sugar-free eating, I HAD LOST 5.2 POUNDS!  I cannot tell you how thrilled I was with that number!

Week 2 of Sarah Wilson's plan started on Monday of this week.  Week 2 is called "Operation Eat Fat."  This is an interim phase of cutting sugar and the purpose is simple:  eat plenty of fats so that (1) "we don't get depressed and frustrated from the deprivation," and (2) "so our bodies don't go into famine mode."  So I did.  I ate fats and protein, but good fat, wholesome and unprocessed.

Good Fats:

1. Olive oil & coconut oil
2. Full-fat dairy, i.e. cheese!
3. Butter
4. Animal fat (not in excess) - bacon, chicken skin
5. Nuts & seeds
6. Avocado

In her book that I'm following, Sarah Wilson says, "fat fills us up - so we can't gorge on it."  And it's so incredibly true!  Full fat cheese is incredibly filling.  I bought the big loaf of Tillamook sharp cheddar cheese before leaving for our trip.  The kids love it, but prior to the sugar detox, I've mostly stayed away from it since I considered it too high calorie.  But since I have been ordered to eat fat, I did!  I ate a small slice for a mid-afternoon snack or half a slice with turkey for lunch. And it tasted so delicious and satisfying!  Have you ever noticed how good, fatty cheese almost melts on your tongue?  Light cheese just doesn't do that.  My sugar cravings are definitely still there, but this "treat" made it much easier to get through those moments of temptation.  

Speaking of temptation, it can be a challenge to go on vacation and stay on any kind of diet, especially a sugar, and carb-free diet.  So I went on the offensive before we'd even left the house.  And this, is why I think I had such a successful trip.  

Here are my TOP 10 TIPS to achieving sugar-free success while on vacation:

1. Prepare sugar/carb-free breakfast items before leaving home.   I made a huge batch of Biggest Loser Pancakes, Bacon Egg Cups, and a Crustless Spinach Quiche before leaving home.
   
   
   Biggest Loser Pancakes
   
   
   
   
   
   Bacon Egg Cups
   
   
   
   
   
   Crustless Spinach Quiche (I did reduce the cheese and double the onion on this recipe, so good!)
2. Pack your portable water bottle.  I have given up all drinks except iced tea and water.  So after drinking a whole jug in the morning, I just fill it right up again.  My Camelback bottle holds 25 ounces, so I drink a little over four bottles per day.  
   
3. Bring a cool chest or cooler bag.  Most of the food I am eating on this new lifestyle is fresh.  And most fresh food needs to be chilled, think meats, cheeses, and other dairy.  Bringing the bag makes sure I have a way to haul around my snacks and meals on the go.  
4. Pack your tennis shoes.  Because, well, duh.  It's good to get out and move.  And as my health coach, Autumn says, "You're one workout away from a good mood."  Isn't that the truth?!
5. Go to a grocery store right after arriving at your vacation destination.  I love Trader Joe's.  They have great pre-packaged food, tons of beautiful veggies and fruits, really good dairy and the kids love their snacks and cereals. 
6. Pack a lunch.  This is kind of an obvious one, but this is so key!  Packing my lunch saved money and kept me from over-indulging in unhealthy treats.  
7. Keep a small bag of nuts in the car or purse.  I can't tell you how many times I would be out somewhere, and my 3:00 "snack-ey" feeling would sneak up on me, begging for sustenance.  I told it to grab some calories from my chubby thighs, they're not hard to find.  But the nagging for a snack wouldn't quit. Anyway, a few nuts always did the trick.  I love cashews and almonds, and right now, I'm buying the salted kind.  I'm cutting sugar slowly, and I know all the salt isn't totally healthy, but I'm doing this "getting healthy bit" one step at a time!  The important thing to remember with nuts is that they are super high calorie, and they fill you up really fast.  It's not like popcorn, where you can keep popping them in, they're filling!  
8. Buy pre-packaged salads.  I love ready-to-pack salads for vacation lunches.  Just check the label for added sugars, especially in the dressings.  I bought one delicious salad from Trader Joe's but the dressing was full of sugar, so I ate it without dressing. It was really good!  The nuts, cheese and meats in the salad made up for the lack of dressing.  
   
9. Buy interesting snacks to give yourself variety.  This week I tried Kale Chips, people.  And you know what?  After almost two weeks of simple, redundant food, they tasted amazing.  And it helps that I'm pretty sure they are fried.  But hey, it's "eat your fat" week, so I'm just trying to be faithful to the program!  
   
   10.  Find other things to bring you joy while on vacation other than food.  I found myself sitting outside in the morning and listening to the birds chirping while doing my devotions.  I took a walk on the beach with my sister.  I listened and watched the kids in the rearview mirror singing their camp songs.  I looked outside of myself and found joy.  
   
   
   At the end of Chapter 2, Sarah Wilson closes the chapter with this fantastic quote:
   
   
   "My aim when I set out to quit sugar was to get my body back to a balanced state. 
   So I could rediscover my natural mechanisms.  Instead of reacting craving to craving.  
   And to find my happy weight."  
   
   
   Week 2 for me has been an absolute success.  I will find out tomorrow if I've lost any weight, but I kind of doubt it.  All these fats have been keeping me, well, fat and happy!  I haven't been hungry at all.  And that was the goal of this week: reduce the cravings and not feeling deprived.  Weight loss would be nice, but that's not the goal this week.  On to my last day of week 2!  
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   

Sugar Detox Day 6: April's Bakery

Have you ever thought about what occupation you would have if you could be or do anything?  If the possibilities were limitless?  I have.  Danny and I have spent a few evenings talking about our "dream jobs."  Danny, my third generation farmer, loves to think about designing and building structures.  He is a very good artist and enjoys sitting down with pencil and paper and drawing, even now.  One of his dream jobs is an architect.  He has others of course, like being paid to ride his motorcycle or mountain bike.

My dream jobs are all very different.  From managing a horse ranch in Kentucky, to owning a book store, or even being one of those people who travel all over the world to write travel books.  But my favorite dream job is running a bakery.  A super cute bakery, like the one in that Meryl Streep movie, It's Complicated.  

See?  Doesn't Meryl look happy?   And she doesn't seem to be overindulging in the pastries that literally surround her!  But that, sadly, wouldn't be me, at least way back when I was a sugar addict (5 days ago).  I'd be having eclairs for breakfast, croissants for lunch, and cake for dinner.  

My point is that I love baking.  I like cooking meats and veggies and salads, of course, but they're not as exciting or pleasing as cookies, cakes or cinnamon rolls.  I've missed baking very much since starting this little journey on Monday, so I decided to do some baking last night.  For the kids.  And Danny.  Let's just make that very clear.  

I baked a Vanilla Coconut Pound Cake to serve with strawberries and blueberries in honor of the 4th of July.  I found the recipe on the back of my Bob's Red Mill Coconut Flour bag I picked up Vons.  By the way, for all of my Valley peeps, our local Vons carries all kinds of gluten free goodness, and they're Bob's Red Mill section is growing!   My family has started avoiding wheat products ever since my second child, Clara, started showing signs of a sensitivity to gluten.  The recipe called for a mixture of coconut flower, gluten free flower, brown rice flower and sugar.  Sigh.   

The pound cake smelled glorious baking, and I started getting nervous. Why, oh why, did I decide to do this??!!  I can avoid a chocolate bar in the house, ice cream, sugary cereals, but a baked pound cake?  One that smells like a perfect mixture of vanilla, coconut, and heaven while baking?  The pound cake came out of the oven looking like a loaf of golden moist deliciousness, and I felt almost mad at it.  How dare it look so good?  Does it have any idea what I'm going through?!  I wished it would run out the door like a gingerbread man and leave me alone, but alas, I would be the crazy old woman running after it.  

So I served the warm pound cake with a topping of fresh berries and whipped cream.  The family oohed and aahed.  I sat with my fancy dish (I read that using a pretty dish can make one's food appear more decadent) and nibbled on my berries sans cake, sans whipped cream.  And you know what, it was good.  Really good.  Just the berries, with their natural sweetness was enough.  I must admit that I had one spoonful of the warm pound cake, and it tasted amazing, and sooooooo sweet!  But that one spoonful was plenty.  I know it sounds silly, but I know that God helped me with restraint.  I truly didn't feel that I needed anymore, and that is not in my nature.  He had taken over for me.  

I don't think I'll ever have my own bakery.  So I'll have to live vicariously through my family's annual cinnamon roll stand, and my own little kitchen.  And you know what?  That's the dream job I was meant to have anyway.  

On to the weekend, and on with the detox!  Each day is getting better, each morning a little sunnier, as the white poison leaves my body.   Yay!  

Sugar Detox Day 4: The Early Bird

I am not a morning person.  You'd think that since I married a farmer, that I'd naturally learn to rise with the sun as he does, but I haven't made that change unfortunately.

What's funny is that I totally understand and agree with the benefits of rising early.  Jesus rose early in the morning to pray (Mark 1:35), and many Psalms and other books proclaim the blessings of waking up to seek God first thing upon waking.  But I struggle with that.  I want to be like Psalm 119:148 that says, "My eyes are awake before the watches of the night, that I may meditate on your promise."

I've actually lived out that practical wisdom in my life before.  I remember having to rise super early in college to make it to campus for a 7:00 AM lab class.  And my whole day would go better.  Even waking up for an early rising child (this would be my oldest, Emma, who is her father's daughter in that way!), and then staying up to pray, read, do laundry, prepare breakfast, I would feel more purposeful and accomplished by the end of the day.  But I haven't been able to maintain the early rising habit.

Anyway, I truly believe that my sugar addiction has hindered my ability to get up early.  As a sugar addict, I would semi-wake up when Danny left around 5:45 AM, then fall back asleep, only to be awakened by two of the kids snuggled next to me, reading books, between 7:00 and 7:45 AM.  And even at that late hour, I wouldn't want to wake up.  I'd feel groggy and lazy, not willing to roll out of bed to start my day.  And this after 8 hours of solid, wonderful sleep!  It's not like I have babies anymore waking me up at all hours of the night, I get those blissful, consecutive amazing hours of sleep every night!

So last night, we were sitting around the living room as a family.  I'd just finished reading the Greek myth, "Pandora's Box" to the kids, which they loved, and we were just about to start our family prayer time.  The kids started bickering about something totally dumb.  Like, one wanted to sit on this certain section of the couch, and that had been "claimed" by someone else.  Just dumb.  So, I, being the headachy, tired, sugar addict detoxing parent, told them to, "Stop it, stop it, stop it!!!"  in a semi-loud voice….ok, a yell.  I hate to admit that, but that's how it went down.  It's so ridiculous!!!  Here we are about to lift up others in prayer, and we are bickering about couch positions!?  

Now, I don't know if this happens to your kids in the summer, but my kids have fallen into the terrible habits of complaining, tattling, bickering, and annoying and frustrating each other on purpose, and being generally discontent with life as we know it.  It must be a combination of the lack of routine, or the heat, or just the fact that we all have to stay indoors all the time.  So, I started the dumb parent strategy of asking them, pleading with them, "Why, oh why, are you so discontent and bratty and frustrated all the time?  I've taken you swimming everyday, we just went to Ricochet yesterday, the movies today with all of your friends, what else can I possibly do?"  And then I noticed Danny just looking at me with a knowing look.  And then it dawned on me.  I was creating this! I was creating these needy little bratty behaviors in my normally wonderful kids!! I had spoiled them, and not asked for much in return, so they were ungrateful.  Danny, the sage parent, finally spoke up with his great words of wisdom.  "Kids, when I was your age, I was working on the farm for six hours a day.  I'd be up and out the door for work by 6:00 AM."  Boom.  Did you hear it?  The hammer just fell.

Working is a great way to instill gratitude.  So yesterday morning, the kids and I were all up and out the door at 7:00 AM to do yard work.  We raked, swept, trimmed, pulled weeds, watered the flowers, and  cleaned the goat pen.  And it was so satisfying!!  Believe it or not, after an hour of work, the kids didn't want to stop!  So we gathered up our tools and worked in the front yard until it officially became too humid.  After that, since I was already sweaty and disgusting, I worked out, which felt awesome.  The rest of the day was a thousand times better!!  No, the kids weren't perfect, but I counted one single tattle incident all day!  And it was a legitimate tattle, by the way.  They were happy, upbeat, laughing more and smiling.

This morning we woke up early again and rode our bikes around town for 30 minutes.  The kids dragged home, utterly exhausted and sweaty.  But after the ride and my workout, I made these super delicious  Bacon Egg Cups.  By the way, if you clink on that link and go to the website, I apologize for the rude website title, but it's a great recipe, nonetheless.

My health coach, Autumn, suggested real bacon over canadian bacon, and I have NO PROBLEM whatsoever with that!! So real bacon it is!!   Before putting the raw bacon in the muffin cups, I baked the strips for about 10 minutes at 350 degrees, so they'd be crispier.  I also added about a handful and a half of chopped up mushrooms, onions and spinach.  So delicious!  I ate two, Danny ate four, they were a winner.  I'm going to try making them with chopped green chilies and onions next time….YUM!!  

So here's to discovering a new yummy recipe and helping my kids re-discover an attitude of gratitude!! Hip, Hip, Hooray!!